office space & a pinch of salt

Hmmmm, well. It seems that I'm fairly good at writing the story of my life. Why, just last year I was wishing for a more flow-y work scene that lets nature guide what I do each day. And, lookee here: to a large extent that's what I'm doing now.

When it's warm out, I park myself on the deck on the tree house I'm living at, and set up shop (see image above). When it's hot out, me and the gals head down to the beach to frolic in the waves and float in the effervescent waters.

When it's rainy out I hide in my room, listen to the falling drops and enjoy the solitude.

I go with the flow, and it makes it easy to work everyday. I only have to do a little each day to get a lot done. As long as I set myself daily goals in terms of what I want to complete or manifest I know I'll be covering some serious, galactic ground.

It's quite amazing that what I write in terms of what I want to bring into my life does manifest - all in great timing of course. SPELL it out. As if I'm casting a spell on my life with the works I document on this great web of consciousness called the Internet.

I'm in awe of my power to create. Because there are many skeptics & naysayers out there who I could have let influence my desires. Instead I've simply believed in my heart that the reality I want is possible. I just have to clearly visualize it, know that it will come to be for me, release any attachment to how it might come into reality, and pay attention to the synchronicities that come forth. Then take action.

That last part I realize is so friggen important. I have to take action. When the opportunities present themselves, carpe diem. Not some day when I feel like it. But NOW.

Action. The fun part!! The part that amalgamates or galvanizes all the other parts of the manifestation process. Like how a pinch of the best ever sea salt ties it all together in chocolate making, or a vanilla infused elixir production, or insert your favorite dish creation process here.

It really brings some yummy food, delicious views, magical experiences and lovely people into my life. Etc. It's great to know that there is an easy recipe for the raddest life ever.

Be mindful what you wish for....

the fun police

I would like to get the following rant off my chest:

There are people out there who are the martyrs of fun. They insist on ensuring that everyone is having a great time. I call these people the fun police.

The thing about the fun police, is that they're pushing their values & ideas on others. "fun" pushers.

What is fun? Well gee...that's a loaded question. What's fun for me can very well be totally not fun for the next person.

What say you? An activity deemed "fun" may not actually be universally so?

Yes, that's what I'm saying, dear fun police.

My classic interaction with the fun police usually occurs in situations where drinking is involved.

I'm not a big drinker, and I would go so far to say that drinking is a boring, default activity. But I digress.

Often at these drinking occasions I'll quietly abstain, or at least don't take it to the level of pirate drunkenness that so many people REGULARLY enjoy. That's a 'special occasion' activity for me. And when it happens it's usually fun.

My point is that invariably, there will be someone there asking me why I'm not drinking....worrying that I won't have fun. "She's not drinking? Surely she can't be having any fun".

Or, like the other night when I was at Blues on Whyte sitting at a table by myself at 2am in the morning..having strangers and acquaintances alike coming up to me insisting that I come back to the dance floor . "Come on, now. Have some fun."

Annoying.

First off, at that point in the night- when my main friends of the evening were off smoking and hooking up in the corner, and the dance floor had exhausted itself as an option, sitting at a table by myself and staring into space was actually a fun option. Also, I had my iPhone keeping me company, texting my favorites that were in other locations that eve.

There I sat, quite content to do nothing, which actually wasn't nothing at all.

But apparently to onlookers this isn't fun. More over, they would have nothing of it.

"This girl MUST have fun. I'm committing the next five minutes of my life to insisting that she have fun".

Secondly, as a strong promoter of personal responsibility, I believe that everyone is in charge of their own fun. I know how to have fun. I'm great at it. And sometimes my 'fun' looks rather dull and boring. But I insist that in that moment I'm having more fun doing what I'm doing, than I'd have doing what someone else thinks I should be doing. Also, when I see others sitting on the side lines minding their own business, I respect that this is out of choice.

Thirdly, since when is forced fun...fun? If I had no interest in dancing in that moment...and someone begrudgingly pulls me onto the dance floor, and I fake it till the song is over - what's the point? Is THAT fun? Are you kidding me?

And finally - how is it that drinking automatically equals fun? In the same vein as "it's not funny if you have to explain it", I dare to say it's not fun if you have to drink to enjoy it.

There. I said it.

And as for the fun police, please refer to the image above for directions.

Happy New Year!!

silly common sensical me

As far as common sense goes, I've certainly been gifted with an above average dose of this handy knowledge. Perhaps because I'm a keen visualizer I naturally, unconsciously sense the outcome of my actions before I begin.

However, even equipped with this underrated super power I amaze myself and the funny little fuck ups I basically invite to happen - even though I know better.

My latest episode is an interesting example of this. I have a water bottle with a 'risky' lid. Risky in that it can easily become unplugged, and in fact really shouldn't be stored in a position other than upright.

Strangely, the other day, I convinced myself that I'd be able to maintain this uprightness in my chaotic handbag....I placed the filled water bottle into my bag and then totally forgot about it.

Minutes later I fished my phone from my purse and noticed it wasn't working. Slowly it all made sense. the drops of water on my phone....and my soaking wet bag all told me that my day wasn't going to include the use of my beloved mobile device.

Shit.

Why did I let this happen?

Did I feel that my life needed a little cellular drama?

Am I taking spring water so seriously that I now baptize my mobile devices to raise their vibration?

Am I that much of a dare devil that I risk the outcome of a loosely sealed water bottle paired with electronics and other cherished items such as a journal filled with my actionable items and universal musings now sealed together and smudged thanks to the earths greatest solvent?

Who knows.

All I can say for sure is that I knew better and I still let it happen.

What the fuck, Krystyna? You're a funny, funny gal.

Dear God,

Please allow my iPhone to dry out and start working again like it was never wet - restoring my contacts and photos and allowing me to effortlessly resume my communication with the cyber world.

Amen.

Sincerely,

Krystyna

white widow

today i danced with the white widow.

her smokey veil wrapped around me

together we felt the fabrics of my laundry

as I folded and tucked away

all the beautiful textures that I've brought home from here & there

each item has it's own exotic tale from creation

inception

like all of us

the scent of clean, mixed with the dry, smokey smell from the nearby wood fire

so rustic, yet so modern this scene is

homey

lovely

i've created this exact moment

hello ruby in the dust

a lyric I just heard

all my senses are tickled with joy.

fireside, with music, laundry, and eyes opened inward.

this is one of those moments where i reveal to myself just how lovely I am. simply lovely.

the games I play

Who knows how to have fun? this gal.

"get the mail before the neighbour does"

"don't pay for parking; be quick like ninja"

"listen to the talking trees"

"order chai & spice it, but don't drink it - just enjoy the artistry of the drink. Instead I drink own brew (made with spring water & superfoods) and enjoy the 'free' wifi"

"speak in broken English using heavy Ukrainian accent"

"work from the movie theatre"

"sneaky long hot shower"

"read books by osmosis"

"praise blitz"

"afternoon nap"

"bring in 'more than enough' wood"

"clean up after myself"

"music induced erotic fantasy"

"no snag/scratch cat hugging"

"happy plants are hydrated plants"

"floss for youth"

"'make my bed' bedroom makeovers"

"I never have laundry because I'm totally on top of it".

"up before 10, sleep before 2"

"bliss balls, tax preparation & me"

"another day, another route"

"adult coloring class"

"teaching kids slang"

"find the beauty in the room" (for example, see image above)

"damn this tastes delicious. fuck I'm good"

"full expression yoga"

"smile at strangers"

"neurotic photography"

the rules are simple. the choices are plentiful. the fun is apparent.

And then everything changed

After living a life that had so many constants for such a long time....the life I've recently immersed myself into seems almost a dream.

Instead of working in an office, I'm working out of the home here I live.

My self-involved urban socialite life now involves gathering wood daily for the fire that warms my home/office, wrapping up bees for the winter, tending to an indoor garden of plants.

I've traded make-up & wine @ trendy spots for daily barefoot walks & medicinal smoothie elixirs. At least for now, anyway.

Basically, I've accepted the challenge of being more conscious in every moment of my life. From going pee to planning out the day - and being very attentive to the future, it seems that everything I do requires my full attention.

Getting up in the morning is much easier than it was just one week ago. I rise before the sun most mornings effortlessly. I start working immediately.

My new boss is demanding, plays a mean set of drums, and wears an Ozzy tee to work.

I love it here.

It's not easy. All this newness has thrown me for a loop. It's humbling yet refreshing to not know what the hell I'm doing - even the simple stuff.

Beginner mind begins.

Today I saw a fox during my walk in the woods.

Animal medicine.

a love letter

Dear Krystyna,

It's a wild notion that it took me most of my life to realize & recognize that you are it, baby! I have always loved you. I've loved you since the day we first met.

You are beautiful. You make my heart sing. I look at you and I see a loving light that fills whatever space you shine yourself into. Your endless gifts & open heart light up my life.

Krystyna, my love, you are a complete, loving woman, perfect & whole as you are and I accept you fully. You are the divine goddess with whom I am destined to spend the rest of my life.

I choose you. I choose you & only you to be with, to create with, to love and embrace, accept unconditionally, and to nourish.

Together we create magic. Together we travel the world & beyond leaving a trail of light in our paths. My love, let's illuminate this planet.

Just know & remember, Krystyna my darling, that you are enough - you have always been and always will be. You are safe with me.

You had me at hello. Or maybe it was at googoo gaga. It doesn't matter. I am standing here before you wanting nothing more & nothing less than to step into light together in a glow of love.

I have been waiting for this moment to arrive. The time is now to soar into this journey together.

I look into your eyes & know. I look into your eyes & see mine. The Universe speaks to me through you, my love. Let's GO.

Yours,

Krystyna