Tuesday, August 16, 2011

the new monogamy



monogamy is one of those words that has a charge. perhaps it might invoke feelings of boredom, or "long term" or limited choice.

looking up the definition of monogamy on dictionary.com does turn on the gag meter slightly. It just seems so old hat, just like that expression.

The actual marriage part of monogamy aside, there are parts I am attracted to. Less about "until death do us part", the idea of being fully present with someone in a given moment has a monogamous vibe to it.

This monogamousness can apply to both romantic & non-romantic relationships.

We invite monogamous moments into our life, particularly when we're with someone special. And by special I mean holy. Less a long term commitment, and more showing respect & reverence for the person we're with at that time. Hey, I like you. I'm going to honour you while we're sharing a space together.

It's so simple. And it makes everyone involved feel so good!

Instead of slutting around texting other people while I'm in conversation with someone, for example, I'm giving them my full attention.

This is a challenge - being present for someone in the midst of cyber interruptions, and other temptations. This is what makes the concept of monogamy of the moment (as I like to call it) that much more special.

Sure at some point I'll have to turn my attention to others. After all the only sure thing in life is change.

But in the moment we're respectfully sharing it together whole heartedly.

The new monogamy is about loving the one you're with and giving them your full attention, even if it's just for a weekend.

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