act out your life

Here's a thought: I'm going to write out a script for myself, for my life - the most fantastical, beautiful, fun script I could possibly conceive, and then act it out.

Sitting next to the world's cheesiest bar in the centre of Winnipeg, a friend was talking about writing a script for his big project, his vision: "Nothing's going to happen unless I script it out".

And the gong of my mind went off. Of course. The script takes getting clear to the next level. It facilitates the action steps that activate the manifestation process.

I feel like writing out a script can take the pressure off too: Suddenly I know what to do! I just act out my part in the script and see what happens.

Granted my life script will have to be revisited periodically for rewriting because I can't predict exactly how my life play will be acted out. That's the exciting part.

As Napoleon Hill said: "Reduce your plan to writing...The moment you complete this, you will have definitely given concrete form to the intangible desire". Sounds like fun to me.

So my next piece of writing after I finish with this post shall be titled: 2012. The Year of Krystyna. It's a working title. I'll jazz it up at some point.

And in that writing I share share the fantastic blossoming that will take place. Just watch the transformation; be a part if it. Write your own script and join the fun.

Look at how much fun Hollywood is having with all those scripts and stories being turned into fully expressed productions. I want to be a part of that magic, and I'm going to start with my own personal 'movie'.

And the Golden Globe goes to.....

pictured above: some principles I'll work into my script. I know. I'm so deep.

she said, he heard.

George Bernard Shaw non-chalantly quoted some time ago, that the single biggest problem in communication is the illusion that it has taken place.

I recently experienced a full on communication breakdown with my laptop taking a "break" from being usable. This little shake up made me much more sensitive to communication processes, since I had to change up the way I worked and communicated with people in a big way...

That, and a friend of mine quoted GBS when I was teaching him how to use his zapper and he still didn't get it. Why? I had assumed he had some idea of how to use it....but he didn't know at all. This would certainly change my instruction.

Assumption can KILL a seemingly well thought out articulation.

Am I truly, CLEARLY communicating what I think I'm saying? Can I find the "illusions" and efficiently fill in the gaps where information is missing?

Yesterday, a group of friends got together to attend a discussion/performance/book signing for our friend Justin Bua's latest book The Legends of Hip Hop.

Part of our posse arrived early to save some primo seats. In my communique's with the outside parties yet to arrive, I mentioned that we were in the 5th row on the right side. The others showed up, but didn't take their seats. Later it was revealed that when they saw the jackets on the empty seats in the 5th row they assumed they were taken.

The information missing from my texts was: we've saved seats for you -they'll have jackets on them. Again with the assumption. Geez.

It's amazing how such a seemingly small detail could totally alter an evening. Instead of having our the rest of our posse right next to us, they were somewhere in the back. Sure everyone had a great time....but they evening was altered.

Another miscommunique. Again, I thought I had said what I needed to...but alas, critical details were omitted. And frankly, both times the details were very simple. I guess when I assume I really do make an ASS out of U & ME. Oh god. I actually just wrote that down and didn't delete it.

It makes we wonder what other things aren't being properly communicated - simple things that could make all the difference.

Breakin' it down: simple & straight forward, no assuming. It's the best way to let people know what the fuck is going on.

pictured above: Darrel (RUN DMC) and Justin Bua rap about hip hop at the LACMA

damn you, mercury

When mercury is in retrograde, the suck factor can rise pretty quickly. One minute I'm trucking along having the best day ever, the next minute I get cold cocked in the face unexpectedly by some trivial misunderstanding.

The thing about Mercury that people who don't give shit about astrology might not understand, is that the transit of this planet has a long felt historical pattern of behavior when it's in its "retrograde" position.

This pattern is basically expressed through VERY POOR COMMUNICATION. Emails might not get sent, texts not received, whispers not heard, etc.

While this seems quite simple....poor communication is the root of so many problems that really mercury in retrograde can really fuck things up if I'm not extra diligent with my interchanges...and I'm just one part of the dialogue.  Whether they're aware of it or not the other parties are affected too.

And even when I'm extra attentive I notice that things can get hairy anyway. This is when a "good attitude" comes to play.

I suppose the best attitude is to consider the three times of year when mercury IS in retrograde as superhero training. I'll work extra diligently to keep all discourses on the up & up...so that when it's finally over I'll have sharper communication skills when things flow through the channels more easily.

Yes, that sounds nice.

rich rich rich

Through death, I’ve learned how deep the vein of my life’s abundance runs. The eulogies and life celebrations of loved ones color the tapestry of my life and help to illuminate how rich I really am.

This wealth is less about the balance in my bank account, and more about the profound gratitude that I can actually feel expand my heart. Holy shit, I can’t believe how beautiful his life was. And he was a part of my life. And I was a part of his.

My Dido (grandfather) passed away two weeks today. This man who helped raise me, who was there at pinnacle and mundane moments alike, who drove me to my soccer games and delivered homemade hot soup right to our door has checked out. Sad.

I haven’t experienced the mourning process of someone close to me since I was teenaged and my grandma passed. Now older & wiser I hardly feel more equipped to handle this death. The discomfort of impermanence is a lot to swallow.

The pain I feel is a simultaneous twisting of that intense heart expansion I mentioned and the sad emptiness that comes when someone great is gone.

However, with my years I’ve cultivated a perspective that allows death to show me not only how alive I really am, but also how much abundance is infused into my current human experience.

This feels like real wealth. Being at a funeral surrounded by the many family & friends who came to pay their respects and say goodbye; hearing the stories of how this man thrived through adversity, turning a life shaped by war into a life shaped by peace; recognizing that a man who died illiterate was still able to create a beautiful, prosperous life for his family. ETC. My God. What a role model.

Yeah, sure, it's super to be balls rich, sailing the seas on a private yacht or luxury jet-setting with my man bitches. And I’m sure that experience is available to me. But somehow that feels so superficial to the gratitude I feel for having the pleasure of knowing this great man I called Dido.

This song is dedicated to my grandfather.

above: old school. grandparents & grandchildren

look, lady: just fricken do it.

I often have interventions with myself. I'll be trucking along having fun and suddenly I'll cut myself off from the flow with limiting self talk & actions.

"I'll do it later", or "next time", "maybe when I'm better at it", or I'll go for a nap. Classic.

HERE is a classic situation where I actually thought: I'll do it next time. Not in that epic moment where I was primed to do it....but at some uncertain time in the future. Assuming that a perfect opportunity would present itself again AND I felt the desire to do it. What the hell?

Anyway...from time to time I have to remind myself that the MOMENT is NOW. If not NOW, then when?

Really, I feel like I can handle anything. It's mostly about having the confidence in myself to follow through, or just give'er. Sometimes I wonder when I'm going to get over myself and exude that confidence every moment - to the best of my ability.

In fairness to myself, I am getting better.

But what about lapses in confidence that disrupt my flow and stop me in my tracks? What is it that needles my confidence so tauntingly? Fear. (lame). And feeling unworthy. (also lame).

What am I so afraid of anyway? Having fun? Having the best time ever? Experiencing life to the fullest? Seriously. What is my problem over here?

In her book Fierce Medicine: Breakthrough Practices to Heal the Body and Ignite the Spirit, Ana T. Forrest speaks of stalking your fear. Just turning around, staring whatever it is that I'm shitting my pants about right in the face and saying "fuck you, I'm going to do it anyway", etc.

And of course, as expected, what was scary never is as 'scary' as it seems.

In this space & time, it's important to not waste space or time. We must seize the moment and get 'er dun.

There really is no time for me (or anyone else for that matter) to indulge in low-self-esteemy ways of being.

There's just too much work to do on this planet.

pictured above: me after I performed Black Bird (Beatles) in front of an audience in LA. turns out, I like singing in front of a crowd dressed like a fashion victim.

tastebud ticklers

Every once and while I'll eat something that is so delicious it's a mind fuck. What? How does this taste so good? It's ridiculous!

This happened a few weeks ago when I was swirling between California and Arizona. A lovely lady named Christina brought Avocado a gift of fresh Barhi dates.

I had heard of Barhi dates before; my friend Heidy got really excited about them when they were fresh in season and available on the internet for a slight investment. Yes, yes. Medjool's, etc are good and all....but compared to Barhi's they simply are shrivelled fruits.

And really - look at these things? Do they look like they would melt your heart with their tastiness?

Frankly I didn't get it. I mean, I like dates and all....but I truly did not understand my friends enthusiasm.

Until now.

Caramely & delicious, these dates made me go to my special place each time I had a chance to enjoy them.

It blows my mind sometimes how nature creates these foods that are so epically delicious just by themselves. Damn she is amazing. Enter slow clap here.

My point: I recommend tasting what I feel that candy makers have only tried to imitate. Nature's true caramel. Open yourself to the experience of a fresh Barhi date. Dang. You won't regret it.

flying high

I've adopted quite a few habits to keep myself healthy despite all the flying I do.

I'll wear a Schumann Resonance device like a zapper to help keep me grounded while I'm flying. I'll fly at night whenever possible to avoid the high radiation that daytime flying brings. I'll take MegaHydrate - a potent antioxidant - to keep myself hydrated and again protected from the avian elements. Further, vials of Quintessential give me a mineral intense moisture. So appreciated way up there.

My biggest challenge is water. Since I've committed to not drinking plastic water, this means that I do go thirsty sometime - particularly when I'm on a plane.

This can be challenging, because dang I get thirsty when I fly. But I know that really, anything I could consume that's provided by the plane really won't put me ahead on a hydration level.

Demineralized, reverse osmosis tap water? What the heck is that really going to do for me? Strip my body of all the good things I work so hard to put in? That's what I thought. I'm more likely adding to my toxicity level and I'm also contributing to our waste problem.

It'd be one thing if the drinks they poured on the plane were in reusable cups, but they are not.

I probably average 4 flight segments per month. If I use just one plastic cup per flight, that's 48 plastic cups per year that are used and trashed - assuming I'm on a short haul flight. This is JUST ME! Nevermind all the other people on the plane, and all the other planes & flights. And of course the water that I could drink comes from a plastic bottle - more plastic! These bottles may be recycled after they're emptied, but I don't know for sure.

And further, the water (or other beverage of choice) that comes in these bottles are loaded with xeno-estrogens and other hormone mimicking chemicals that don't do the body good.

It seems like one small thing I can do for myself & for the Mother - who selflessly gives to me each and every day. A little water fast never hurt anyone....and when I do get to my destination I make it a priority to hydrate with a liquid of considerable quality: fresh spring water harvested from the source is the best, or purchased spring water in glass. Coconut water is great too, either from a young coconut or in glass or in a tetra pack.

Those liquids are truly hydrating, and fully worth the wait.