And then everything changed

After living a life that had so many constants for such a long time....the life I've recently immersed myself into seems almost a dream.

Instead of working in an office, I'm working out of the home here I live.

My self-involved urban socialite life now involves gathering wood daily for the fire that warms my home/office, wrapping up bees for the winter, tending to an indoor garden of plants.

I've traded make-up & wine @ trendy spots for daily barefoot walks & medicinal smoothie elixirs. At least for now, anyway.

Basically, I've accepted the challenge of being more conscious in every moment of my life. From going pee to planning out the day - and being very attentive to the future, it seems that everything I do requires my full attention.

Getting up in the morning is much easier than it was just one week ago. I rise before the sun most mornings effortlessly. I start working immediately.

My new boss is demanding, plays a mean set of drums, and wears an Ozzy tee to work.

I love it here.

It's not easy. All this newness has thrown me for a loop. It's humbling yet refreshing to not know what the hell I'm doing - even the simple stuff.

Beginner mind begins.

Today I saw a fox during my walk in the woods.

Animal medicine.

a love letter

Dear Krystyna,

It's a wild notion that it took me most of my life to realize & recognize that you are it, baby! I have always loved you. I've loved you since the day we first met.

You are beautiful. You make my heart sing. I look at you and I see a loving light that fills whatever space you shine yourself into. Your endless gifts & open heart light up my life.

Krystyna, my love, you are a complete, loving woman, perfect & whole as you are and I accept you fully. You are the divine goddess with whom I am destined to spend the rest of my life.

I choose you. I choose you & only you to be with, to create with, to love and embrace, accept unconditionally, and to nourish.

Together we create magic. Together we travel the world & beyond leaving a trail of light in our paths. My love, let's illuminate this planet.

Just know & remember, Krystyna my darling, that you are enough - you have always been and always will be. You are safe with me.

You had me at hello. Or maybe it was at googoo gaga. It doesn't matter. I am standing here before you wanting nothing more & nothing less than to step into light together in a glow of love.

I have been waiting for this moment to arrive. The time is now to soar into this journey together.

I look into your eyes & know. I look into your eyes & see mine. The Universe speaks to me through you, my love. Let's GO.

Yours,

Krystyna

cardboard food

one of my co-workers came into my office today, and after tootin' in my space proceeded to tell me about her digestive woes, and how she thought gluten was the culprit. I mentioned that I've been eating gluten free for a while and that my digestion is doing very well - I've certainly had my share of intestinal disturbances.

the interesting thing that she said to me, was that she wasn't super strict about keeping her diet sans gluten since it contradicted her value of eating whatever she wanted. "Life is too short to eat cardboard".

I can appreciate that.....but what's ironic about this (to me, of course) is that the meal that caused her GAStric distress came out of a package. Powdered potatoes, meat & gravy. Um....yum?

What is cardboard food really? There was nothing nutritionally real in that 'meal from a pouch' which apparently tasted good. Isn't life too short to eat food that isn't real? Isn't life too short to eat food that gives you such bad gas that even professional conversations require apologies?

I know that a lot of "health" food is low on taste, but so much of it - food that is grown and prepared with intention & creativity - is simply delicious. Let your taste buds guide you - YES.

Mamma's homecooked meals can fall in this category if they aren't full of our modern short cuts. My grandmother has amazing soup making abilities....but at some point her soups ceased to have homemade stock ingredients, and started having an MSG-laded, artificially flava'd bases. Sigh. So close.

I do agree with my co-worker. Life IS too short for cardboard foods - both the instant fake stuff and the tasteless health varieties.

all you gotta do is get off your ass and find it. Tastes great and beats being that girl who's known for 'crop-dusting', right?

a dream come true?

today i did something really invigorating. I gave my notice at my current J.O.B.

This wasn't nearly as hard as I thought it would be...

I had a heart to heart with my current boss, we came up with an end date and it's all good.

my whole body is vibrating right now! The galaxy has cracked open.

onward and upward.

dissolving 'office Krystyna'

After an intense two week break from the every day that felt more like a month, i'm back to my normal daily life....and i can feel myself leaking back into my old habits.

It just seems that I would take the experience and beauty that I've recognized in myself these past few weeks and embody it in on a cellular level - not just err to the good ole ways that aren't so good at all. Focus, focus. Momentum, momentum. Walk on the water of my life.

I have to say goodbye to my ordinary life; I've fallen in love with magic.

luminous tease

i'm going to change myself in the way I want everyone else to change.

The new me shall be more giving, more caring, more sensual, more thoughtful. I'll wear more interesting clothes that have a beautiful story sewn into their creation, and travel around the world as a career. I'll be more tolerant of everyone, even the bitches & dickheads that drive me crazy. I'll dance naked in the rain, and look in the mirror everyday and say "fuck, you're beautiful". I'll drink sunshine and eat clouds. i'll grow a garden with sunflowers, sugar snap pees and dandelions. Lots of beautiful dandelions. I'll have my own theme song, and I'll play it every time I make an entrance. i'll sleep under the stars and I'll get along with my sister. I'll teach animals to groove to the beat. I'll be surrounded by music and the quietude of nature. I'll give people a chance, and I'll give myself a chance too. I'll rock out more, and I'll sit at a desk less. i'll fall in love with myself. why not?

yeah. good plan.

Listen to We Love Machine....yum!

when I say go it will happen

life is trucking by at lightning speed. I feel like I am in the eye of a hurricane of changes that surround me. Things seem pretty stable in my life. part of me says: hey! when's it gonna be my turn? but the other part of me says: be grateful, Krystyna. Enjoy this peace. All in divine timing...

what ever I cannot seem to change i must simply accept. And vice versa. Otherwise I'm basically looking to get bruised.

having a crystal clear idea of the hurricane of changes I'd like to experience is great idea. let the visualization begin.

And on that note of just being, listen, and let your shoulders shake: Madder Red